not so bad
Yesterday's post was a realer one. While my emotions threatened to swallow me whole, I was able to steady myself. How do I know I'm better today? Well, because today was not so bad.
All that slow inhaling and exhaling made a difference. Who would've thought?
Today is proof that I am not my emotions.
Emotions request to be witnessed, they don't want to get stuck within. They want to breathe, they desire movement, expression, and release.
I've tried to fight them all my life, operating under the belief that it was either me or them. Now I'm finally beginning to understand that I must expand, allowing room for co-existence.
The shame, pain, grief —
The joy, the freedom, the pleasure —
I must let them do what they must.
Sometimes they come and go like waves lapping on a peaceful beach shore.
Other times they tumble with fury and knock me off my balance.
On occasion, they are rushing riptides, crashing down and sweeping me under, robbing me of oxygen and the ability to discern up from down.
I am curious to learn how I might hold space for the dualities infinities of life and the emotional concoctions they create. The combinations of stress and satisfactions know no bounds.
One area of life can be utterly jaw-dropping fantastic —
While another area can be equally devastating and demoralizing.
The beauty and the beast is in the eye of the beholder.
As humans, it is a great responsibility to view from both lens, to contemplate the purposes and impacts of multiple perspectives.
Diversity is essential to our emotional landscape — we need the full spectrum of human experiences and voices to better understand the world around us.
I suppose that's partially why I write in public these days. I would like to add my drop into the ocean, to make peace with the emotional tides, to share how I am navigating such a task.
Wishing you well on your healing journey and path of acceptance.
Thanks for being here.
Sincerely,
Nadine ♥